Magnificent Bastard

Friday, October 31, 2014

Ask the MB: Breast Guys

AG jeans in 'nice ass' wash
AG jeans in 'nice ass' wash
Q: While we have long had our suspicions, you have made it abundantly clear that you, dearest, are a true blue, card-carrying breast guy. Of course, we love that about you ... it shows that under that cool, aloof and artfully disheveled exterior lies a lusty, red-blooded bastard. Luckily for us boyish-figured girl detectives, however, there is a non-negligible percentage of your brethren who are actually ass guys. (Perhaps you have a diagram for this?) Why don't you throw them some sugar from time to time, Sugar?
--Nancy Drew


A: We will definitely consider how an ass-breast chart be best laid out. In the meantime, we don't think it's abundantly clear we're breast guys. We've admired Heidi Klum's ass (in spite of the Photoshop lypo), and flat-chested Audrey Hepburn is one of our favorites. We were also one of the first organizations on record as being opposed to Hillary Clinton's increased cleavage exposure.

Would real breast guys take that stance? OK, well, maybe. But the point is, we do not discriminate or play favorites. Breasts and asses have equality before the law MB.

It's all really a moot point anyhow. A bird's personal style and what's between her ears trump breasts and asses any day.

POURCAST

BETA

Sazerac

  • 3 shots rye whiskey (or to taste)
  • 1 sugar cube
  • Peychaud's Bitters
  • quarter shot of Absinthe
  • lemon twist

Soak the sugar cube with the bitters and place in the bottom of a highball glass. Mash with the back of a spoon (or muddler, which we hope has not been used to make a Mojito), add the rye whiskey and fill the glass with ice. Stir for about 30 seconds and then strain into another lowball glass that has been rinsed with Absinthe and filled about halfway with ice. Garnish with a lemon twist.


In-Depth Sazerac Coverage:

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