Magnificent Bastard

Tuesday, March 19, 2024



Ask the MB: Girlfriend's Eyebrow Grooming

Ask the MB: Girlfriend's Eyebrow Grooming
Q: I love my girlfriend and everything she does or wears is sexy and beautiful. Except for one thing, she plucks her eyebrows so thin it makes her look like a surprised doll. I wish she would grow them out naturally, but I have no idea how to tell her -- plus I don't think an MB would ever try to correct his girl's appearance. But the eyebrows are making me crazy -- I was even thinking of taking her camping for three weeks just to force them out. What can I do?
--Lee


A: Lee, first off, thanks for entrusting us with your love life -- we are always surprised at how few people seem to think a men's style website is the most appropriate venue for solving tricky relationship problems.

In any case, our first thought is that we generally prefer cat-like women: graceful, inscrutable, with fastidious grooming habits. But we agree that plucked, or at least overplucked, eyebrows take fastidious grooming one step too far.

So here's what we suggest you do. Casually browse through one of your girlfriend's old photo albums, tell her how cute she looks, etc. When you find a photo from her pre-plucking years, ramp up the praise even more: "Oh my God, look at you. Those eyebrows. You look like Brooke Shields!" Don't overdo it or she'll get suspicious. Just the one comment and move on to some other subject. Now, the seed has been planted. If your girlfriend fails to take action, that's a clear sign she'd prefer to look like Divine than Brooke Shields. In which case you have our deepest sympathies.

POURCAST

BETA

Whiskey Manhattan

  • 3 oz rye whiskey
  • 1 oz sweet vermouth, preferably Dolin
  • 3 dashes Fee Brothers Whiskey Barrel-Aged bitters

Stir over ice, strain into a chilled cocktail glass, and garnish with a pearl onion.


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