Magnificent Bastard

Friday, August 18, 2017

Ask the MB -- Principle of Organic Materials

Ask the MB -- Principle of Organic Materials
Q: Regarding North Face fleece, just what exactly is the principle of organic materials?

A: The principle of organic materials is simple: It's that organic materials are inherently superior to anything made by man, even if they are less practical. So when given a choice, always choose organic materials.

Try this thought experiment to illustrate the point: Imagine the ultimate MB -- JFK -- sailing a boat made out of fiberglass. Your head just exploded. See what we mean? Plus, given that organics are the result of Mother Nature, there are always slight imperfections that enhance another core MB attribute: artful dishevelment. (Note JFK's look.)

Use the following table to help guide your decision-making.

If you are about to:

Activity Choose Instead Of
Buy a dress shirt 100% cotton 50-50 cotton-poly blend
Side your house cedar vinyl
Write something down #2 pencil pen
Decide on a date The one with real breasts The one with fake breasts
Tee it up Featherie Titleist Pro V1
Climb Mt. Everest To wear pelts from Nepalese fauna North Face fleece



Last Word

  • 1 oz Plymouth gin
  • 1 oz Luxardo maraschino liqueur
  • 1 oz Green Chartreuse
  • 1 oz fresh lime juice

Combine over ice, stir for 30 seconds, then pour into a martini glass.

In-Depth Last Word Coverage:

The Glass is Always Greener: An MB Guide to St. Patrick's Day Cocktails


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Last Word

Enter any city on earth & start cocktailing. (Zip codes work, too.)


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