Not sure if you should wear that Tommy Bahama shirt out tonight? The magnificent bastard is here to help. Go ahead. Ask away.
Relax, big spender, we want your knowledge, not your credit card info. If you know about something you think we should know about, let us know (so we can then pretend that we knew about it all along.) Send a tip.
Obama is clearly learning on the job. By next year he'll show up in flat-fronts.
BEFORE (July 2008)
1. PDA 2. Bracelet 3. Posing with Charles Atlas (suffers in a "97 lb. weakling" kind of way by comparison)
AFTER (April 2009)
1. Leave PDA at home; no text message important enough to reply to while meeting the troops 2. If you must wear jewelry, stick with nipple rings or other stuff hidden beneath clothes 3. Always pose with Bravo Company, Pygmy Battalion
