Magnificent Bastard

Saturday, April 25, 2015

From the Shop ↷

NEW! 'Springtime in Italy' Tie

A necessity for striding down springtime streets in Italy. And in the USA, too.


Secret Agent Belt

Look like a fictional British Secret Service agent for just $30.07


300-Year Sterling Silver Buckle Belt

Built to look great forever — even if you live to 300


Disposable Letterpress Beverage Shields

Get some before we use them all up!



Anthony Weiner Refuses to Apologize for Flag Pin?

Anthony Weiner Refuses to Apologize for Flag Pin?
When Tiger Woods finally addressed the media after his sex scandal last year, his statement included 3 "sorrys," 1 "apologize" and 0 "regrets." By contrast, Representative Anthony Weiner's opening statement included 4 "sorrys," 1 "apologize" and 1 "regret."

In other words, Anthony Weiner apologized 33% harder than Tiger Woods, and he didn't even nail any of these chicks!

But do you know what Anthony Weiner didn't apologize for? His promiscuous flag pin usage. Seriously, when Biggovernment.com released this photo of his remarkably hairless chest, we initially thought, "No, that can't be him ... no flag pin. He wears that stupid thing every time a camera's within 500 feet."

Later in the day, however, the horny Congressman admitted to and apologized for almost everything — the dick pics, the sexting, the lying. It was a sad, sordid performance, but let's hope, amidst all the political maneuverings and voyeuristic speculation that's sure to follow, its essential lessons are not lost in the hubbub:

1) When you're peppering Internet strangers with questions about their blow-job skills, that's when you should be discreet. When Andrew Breitbart accuses you of tweeting glamour shots of your dong to your Twitter followers, and you actually did tweet glamour shots of your dong to your Twitter followers, that's when you should be totally candid and transparent.

2) If you're 46 years old and your chest is smoother than an 18-year-old stripper's cooch, you have vanity issues.

3) Never wear a flag pin.

Earlier: Hal Holbrook in 1973's The Enforcer. The original American flag lapel pin?

POURCAST

BETA

Old Fashioned

  • 1 raw sugar cube
  • 2 dashes Angostura bitters
  • 3 oz bourbon

On bottom of Old Fashioned glass (what else?) dribble bitters on sugar cube. Muddle. Fill with ice, then with bourbon. Garnish with lemon twist. No, not a thick orange wedge, handful of cherries, or a cup of fruit salad. A simple lemon wedge.


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