Magnificent Bastard

Thursday, July 31, 2014

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Ask the MB -- Sunglass Placement

Ask the MB -- Sunglass Placement
Q: Dearest MB: What's your stance on guys wearing their sunglasses backwards on their head whilst indoors? Actually, what's the best position for sunglasses while indoors? Top of the head? Around the neck? Clipped to the shirt? In the shirt pocket? Clipped to the belt/waistband? Backwards (heaven forbid)? Thanks, MB. You're the best.
--Aaron


A: Well, kudos to you for knowing to remove sunglasses while indoors. As Larry David famously said on an early episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm: "You know who wears sunglasses inside? Blind people and assholes." (Top: Designer Michael Kors, who is not blind as far as we know.)

Let's review the options in order of badness, worst to least-worst:

Backwards: Never. Goal of every MB should to not look like Zach Johnson (winner of last year's Masters).

Around neck: This would require a strap of some kind. Croakies? Not cool, even as an ironic gesture.

Clipped to pants: Nothing should ever be clipped to your pants.

Clipped to shirt: We're just not that big on clipping.

Top of head: We've previously set the rules for this. Based on your location, you might qualify.

In shirt pocket: Good, yet most designer dress shirts don't have a pocket available.

Your best bet: stay outdoors.

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  • 1 oz Plymouth gin
  • 1 oz Luxardo maraschino liqueur
  • 1 oz Green Chartreuse
  • 1 oz fresh lime juice

Combine over ice, stir for 30 seconds, then pour into a martini glass.


In-Depth Last Word Coverage:

The Glass is Always Greener: An MB Guide to St. Patrick's Day Cocktails

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