Let's all try and avoid these devastating fashion faux pas.
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1. backwards Do you play catcher for a major league ball club? Minor league? Local softball team? No? Then don't do this. |
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2. oakley blades Your Tour de France riding days are over, pal. |
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3. bluetooth headset 1. Trust us, you're not that important. |
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4. gold necklace Rap moguls, NBA stars, and Mr. T excluded. Some white guy from the 'burbs, nuh uh. |
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5. tommy bahama shirt When in Hawaii, this is OK. In the upper 49, toolbag. |
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6. national review magazine In close association with bad style, bad politics. |
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7. belt-clipped cell phone Scream "I am a middle manager!" a little louder. The guy across the street didn't hear you. |
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8. "cause" wristband Exceptions made if you or immediate family member is battling various wristband maladies. Otherwise, grab a scissors. |
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9. over-the-knee, double-pleated shorts Two things wrong here: |
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10. crocs The Zubaz of the '00s. Here's a good rule to live by: Never wear the same shoes as your 5-year-old nephew. |
BETA
Into a rocks glass filled halfway with ice, pour your house scotch whisky, which of course is something like Glenmorangie, Oban, Old Pulteney, Macallan, Highland Park, Talisker, Scapa, Lagavulin, Laphroaig.
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