Magnificent Bastard

Monday, May 25, 2020



pandemic

Nothing Got Between Bob Ross and His Calvins

Nothing Got Between Bob Ross and His Calvins

We've binged McMillions, Curb Your Enthusiasm (Season 10), Wild Wild Country, Lorena, Chernobyl, Ozark (Season 3), How To Fix a Drug Scandal, and the 2010 Green Bay Packer season.

But these were mere sprints. We've embarked on a marathon: the complete Bob Ross oeuvre. 31 seasons. 13 episodes each. By our math that works out to roughly 200 hours of happy clouds, friendly trees, and mistakes happy accidents.

One thing we were not expecting to see: Bob Ross in designer jeans. Season 4, Episode 6, at 20:29. Warm Summer Day.

MB Deal of the Week: The Kooples Stay-at-Home Sweatshirts

MB Deal of the Week: The Kooples Stay-at-Home Sweatshirts

We admit. The Kooples closed us. First it was 50-60% off. Then an additional 20%. Then a bump to an additional 25%.

That was the trigger for us to load up on their sweatshirts: three with stripes perfect for Zoom calls and staring blankly into the fridge, and one camo perhaps best for social long-distancing.

Clockwise from top left:

Grey Crewneck w/ Tri-Color Ribbing. $215 $64.50.

Round Neck Grey Cotton Sweatshirt w/ Stripe. $215 $81.75.

Blue Cotton Sweatshirt Camoflague Print. $218 $65.40.

Round Neck Blue Cotton Sweatshirt w/ Stripe. $215 $81.75.

As for fit, the camo fits true to size. The striped sweatshirts fit small, so go up one. As for comfort, the camo is just OK. The striped sweatshirts are perhaps the most comfortable we've ever owned.

Band of Brooks Brothers

Band of Brooks Brothers

Great to see Brooks Brothers pitching in to create Personal Protective Equipment for America’s front-line healthcare workers.

Just to show you how much coronavirus has upended the universe, we're hoping the 150,000 masks that Brooks Brothers is planning to produce on a daily basis are all their synthetic narrowly-tailored Soho Fit. In the midst of a pandemic (but only in the midst of a pandemic), artful dishevelment must take a backseat to epidemiology.

Elbow Bump Etiquette: Handshake Rules Still Apply

LHC Group's Bruce Greenstein attempts elbow bump with President Donald Trump during a news conference about the coronavirus in the Rose Garden at the White House, Friday, March 13, 2020, in Washington.
LHC Group's Bruce Greenstein attempts elbow bump with President Donald Trump during a news conference about the coronavirus in the Rose Garden at the White House, Friday, March 13, 2020, in Washington.

Now that the traditional handshake is on hold and the elbow bump is in (except for the most aggressively ignorant buffoons), here's how we suggest you do it:

Make it firm. — We're not talking the force of an NFL forearm bash or that of roided-up '90s MLB power hitters, but pressure should be applied. A mere elbow tap is the handshake equivalent of a wet dishrag.

Eyes. Always the eyes. — Once your elbows have embraced, look the other person directly in the eye. If he reciprocates, you know you've found a man you can do business with. If not, he's probably a crook.

Earlier: Historically Bad Handshakes: John McEnroe

POURCAST

BETA

Martinez

  • 2 parts Hayman's Old Tom Gin
  • 1 part sweet vermouth (Carpano Antica Formula or Dolin Rouge)
  • 1/4 part Luxardo Maraschino liqueur
  • 2 dashes Fee Brothers Whiskey Barrel Aged Bitters

Shake or swirl lightly, garnish with a lemon twist.


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