Magnificent Bastard

Wednesday, January 14, 2026



Ask the MB: Patterned Woven Short-Sleeve Shirts

Winston on the odds of anyone else looking like Winston.
Winston on the odds of anyone else looking like Winston.

Q: The MB stance is to never wear short sleeved button up shirts because you can't roll up the sleeves giving an ultimate amount of artful dishevelment. But ever since Winston rocked the pattern short sleeved shirt on New Girl, I've been seeing them everywhere. Are they still off limits?
—Miguel

A: Miguel, the primary reason Winston Bishop (Lamorne Morris) rocked the patterned short-sleeve woven is because he looked like Winston Bishop.

If you don't look like Winston Bishop, there is a chance this could turn out badly, as you'll see in a minute.

With the help of Nate Silver and 538, we ran 1000 patterned short-sleeve shirt simulations with a random sample of 35 year-old urban-dwelling men, and here are the results.



See also: Top 10 Ways to Look Like a Total Toolbag

POURCAST

BETA

Rusty Gets Nailed

An MB-updated version of the Rusty Nail (3 oz scotch / 1 oz Drambuie).

  • a healthy dose of a single malt scotch (The Macallan)
  • splash of Drambuie

Serve on the rocks with a lemon twist. An hour later roll yourself into bed (not necessarily alone).


In-Depth Rusty Gets Nailed Coverage:

Magnificent Bartender: Rusty Nail

×

Currently in
Minneapolis, Minnesota

25° Clear/Sunny

Rusty Gets Nailed

Enter any city on earth & start cocktailing. (Zip codes work, too.)

Feedback? editor@magnificentbastard.com


recent posts

ask mb

Got a style question? We're all ears. And antlers. Ask away.


tip mb

If you know about something you think we should know about, let us know (so we can pretend we knew about it all along). Send a tip.


features


channels